ragdoll_baby (ragdoll_baby) wrote,

but you look so good it hurts *sometimes*

i dun know what to write. i wanna stop doing this but i'm so scared to because i know when i stop writing it all just stays in my head and i dun know if that's better or worse. maybe if it stays then i'll have to deal with it, which could be a good thing. but then again, it could make it worse.

the only conclusion i have is that every fucking time i post the same old shit. and it doesn't mean it's not true. everytime i write it i feel the same way, and it all makes sense and it is what i'm feeling. but if i've already written it then maybe i don't ned to anymore.

it feels like i'm kicking a habit or something though, and i don't know why. i feel so much better when i write things down. which has to stop. cause it has gotten me into much strife over the past couple off days. i know not everyone wants to read the stuff i write. i know it's pointless. and i know it doesn't mean anything to most people. but that's not why i do it, i just need to get it out. if people want to read it they can. to be honest i'll never know if they do or not. but after i hand ot over or press send or whatever it's their choice after that. that was the point of writing. it's not as intruding as going up to someone and tapping them on the shoulder, but it still lets me get it all out.

i dun even know why i'm doing this. it's exactly what i want to stop doing.

so, it stops here i hope. fuck knows i'll be back but eh. hopefully not forever.
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